


Sacrifice and Salvation

by Madmoome



Category: Killjoys (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-09
Updated: 2016-07-30
Packaged: 2018-06-01 03:02:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 23,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6498244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Madmoome/pseuds/Madmoome
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After many months, the team was finally back together and working well. Then one day Johnny Jaqobis watched new trouble walk through the doors of the Royale and he did just as Alvis always alleged. He set out to fix the problem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Finding Him

**Place: Sowber**

**Time: Now**

After 7 long months they eventually found John on Sowber, an inhospitable little rock at the far reaches of the J star cluster. The crap-hole moon, shouldn't have been able to sustain life, but it's natural atmosphere of barely breathable air and heavier gravity, meant that the J's most defeated souls had managed to make a home there. Dutch and D'avin stood amongst a decent sized crowd, a social gathering of sorts and she studied the people around them. They were dirty and pale and made even the poorest of Westerlyn's, look like Royalty.

Population on Sowber was low, as was life expectancy. People joked that it was the last place the God's made, molded together from the left overs of the universe. It was certainly a hell hole, a dark spinning rock of dust. But it's importance across the J was immense. The whole surface was rich in precious metal. Not only highly sought after on Qresh, but every central planet as far as the eye could see. Mining the metal was Sowber's one and only industry and pretty much the only way to make a living on the whole moon.

It was also pretty lawless, and that ungoverned way of life was supported by the large corporations who owned the mines. By turning a blind eye, they could pay less Joy to their employee's. On paper it looked like the perfect hideout for fugitives, but no-body voluntarily went to Sowber, unless life had thoroughly beaten them down. The quality of living was just so poor, that almost all forms of punishment were preferable over long term refuge on Sowber. Except maybe execution by black rain.

But in amongst all the surrounding Hell, they had found Johnny, and Dutch couldn't take her eyes off him as he walked out into the centre of the make shift arena. For a moment it felt like Déjà vu, recalling the first time she had seen D'avin in those slave ship fights, but that feeling didn't last long. This brawl was something else entirely.

Dutch felt like she was suffocating. The shock at seeing him like that, was just….. too much. After only a few minutes of the fight, she had to look away and tried to gain control of her breathing. She pulled out her portable oxygen tank and sucked back great gasps, helping battle the poor quality air. While she faced away from the scene, she looked up at D'avin who stood stone like, similarly effected by what they had just witnessed. His face was a sickly grey in colour and Dutch was sure she could see tears in his eyes.

The tightly packed crowd around them released a collective jeer, forcing Dutch to risk another look at Johnny. This hadn't been a fight. It had been a blood bath, one that John had apparently won, although there didn't look to be any winners, as both fighters lay motionless across the blood spattered ground.

"Trix!" D'avin stated, in little more than a whisper.

"Has to be" Dutch agreed, while trying to hold back bile rising in her throat.

Trix was a drug, it was aptly named too. While Jakk released a bliss-like state, Trix literally tricked the mind and body away from what was real. But it wasn't addictive like Jakk and you it wasn't something you took voluntarily. The fight they had just witnessed had no skill, no technique, no rules. The sounds of bones smashing as the fighters ripped into each other was beyond what any human could endure. That was why they knew Johnny must have been loaded. Only Trix, had the ability to suspend pain, to such a degree.

She looked anywhere but where Johnny's unconscious body lay. Her best friend was a tough son of a bitch, but he generally liked to talk his way out of a fight before fists started flying. He had a certain charm, those blue eyes of his could work wonders and she was proof of that. When they first met, she was a stone cold killer, but in no time at all she had got him a job at the RAC and trusted him with her life. He had always been the heart of the team. The humanity that both she and D'avin sometimes lacked. Dutch just didn't like the person she was, without him around.

It was then she saw D'avin's hands pump repeatedly into fists, while watching men drag his brother out of the arena. Even after all this time, D'av was still very much a shoot first, ask questions later, kind of guy and Dutch had to leap forward stopping him from storming the place and unleashing chaos.

"We've gotta think smart D'av, if we go in charging, we'll never get out alive"

"Well give me a damn plan!" D'avin yelled with desperation. Someone had pumped his little brother full of Trix and forced him into that arena. D'avin knew all too well what it was like to have his mind messed with and he didn't want Johnny to be haunted by his actions, the way he had been. But forming an Escape plan was a bit of a problem, they couldn't just haul him on to the ship. The increased oxygen levels on Lucy would kill him without proper reacclimation. But on top of that, they would now need to flush his system of drugs and work out how to mend a broken body.

"Just give me a minute to think" she answered D'avin, while scanning the area. The place didn't seem to have much in the way of a town. There was no brick built structures like in Westerly, just a string of cave dwellings scattered in all directions. Her gaze fixed upon one particular cavern that had a higher than average number of people flocking to it. Dutch prayed it was a drinking establishment, Bars always had such a varied clientele, and any problem could usually be solved, if the right person was approached.

"Come on, we are going in there" she pointed and pulled D'avin away from the blood soaked arena.

A thick smoke permeated through the bar and made it even harder for Dutch to catch her breath. D'avin didn't seem to experience the same difficulties and she wondered if he'd been in similar environment's during his time in the military. After taking a seat at the bar, Dutch ordered them both some cheap Hokk. Then, they just sat in silence and listened to the conversations around them, praying that an opportunity would present itself. The longer they sat there, the more hopeless things looked, but Dutch was determined they were going to get Johnny off the moon before the night was over.

The first point of the plan had to be seeing John up close. Dutch needed to assess his condition and hope he was able to assist in his own escape. But she had no idea where in town he was being held. Her eyes dotted around all the patrons and she noticed a couple of women giving D'av the once over. From their appearance and how they moved their bodies, she would guess they were sexers. An idea started forming in her head as she watched them for a few minutes, then she turned to D'avin.

'I think I have found our plan" she smiled, and D'avin waited for her to continue.

"I'm going in undercover, Johnny always did love some undercover work".


	2. Memories

**Time: 7 months ago**

**Place: Westerley Old Town**

"Are you not going back over there?" Pree asked, as Johnny pulled his eyes away from the table Dutch and D'avin sat around. He shook his head and made himself comfortable at the bar.

"I'm fine just here" he announced, swallowing down the Hokk Pree poured for him. He felt is eyes grow heavy and realized for the first time just how tired he was. For months he and Dutch had been working three jobs. Ever since Khlyen had taken D'avin, they had spent every free moment scouring the Quad looking for him. At night they helped rebuild Old Town after the firebombing and in-between those two, they continued to accept warrants. Quitting the day job was not an option, the information available to killjoys was essential in the search for his brother.

Thankfully, all the effort paid off and in a little under six months they have found D'avin on Arkyn of all places. Physically he seemed fine, although it was clear a lot had happened that D'av was still trying to process. And as much as Johnny wanted to say finding him was the end of it all, that just wasn't the case. All they seemed to have done was double the unanswered questions they had about Red 17 and level 6. John felt they were heading for a long war, and Khlyen was the key to it all.

He chanced another look over at his best friend and brother and how they couldn't seem to stop smiling at each other. Then he felt a knot form at the pit of his stomach at seeing them that way, but managed to find a smile, albeit sad. Over to his right, Pree stood wiping down glasses. The bartender was a man who never missed a trick, so after a few minutes of spying on the Jaqobis drama, he felt the need to comment.

"I think we have already had this conversation" Pree cryptically announced, waiting for Johnny to take the bait.

"And what conversation is that?" the killjoy sighed, in reply.

"The one where I remind you, that you had six years to make a move, so you can't complain when your brother beats you to it" Pree answered, watching as Johnny rolled his eyes at the well- covered subject matter.

"And that would also be the same conversation, where I tell you repeatedly, she is like a sister to me, there's nothing between us" he insisted.

"If you say so" Pree replied, totally unconvinced.

"I do say so, Pree, you really need to give it a rest". Johnny said, a little annoyance creeping into his tone. The bartender moved over and stood in front of Johnny, leaning forward and forcing eye contact with the younger Jaqobis.

"I think you forget killjoy, I was here that night, I saw it happen" Pree's words were vague but Johnny read the subtext perfectly. He blanched as the bartender held his eye contact. The night in question was a story all on its own.

Since the bombings, Old Town had been in a mess. But Alvis and his resistance and saved it from becoming another Sugar Point, hundreds had survived because of the bunkers. Enough to rebuild the ruins. Westerely expected a second wave, troops on foot to finish off the survivors, but word got out any Company force could except a full on war. Old town had been stock piling weapons for years and were more than ready.

That's when everything became political. The Nine did not want to gain galactic interest to their little domestic squabbles, the bombing alone had more than halved the 7th Generation claims to Leith, so they took that victory and called a truce to any more action.

In the early weeks of rebuilding the town, the few lucky bottles of alcohol that escaped damage, quickly ran out, and Pree was left with a dry bar, which was just a room full of short-tempered people. The reintroduction of outside trade seemed an eternity away, so Pree decided to distill his own liquor. The resulting hooch was undrinkable, but didn't stop the whole town from swallowing down a skin-full. It burned the throat and numbed everywhere else.

After one particularly long evening of clearing rubble and finding bodies hidden underneath, both Johnny and Dutch had headed for the Royale and indulged in the fiery liquid, if only to rid the images of fallen friends and mask the ache across their muscles.

Sometime later in the haze of intoxication, John had kissed Dutch. At least he thought he had kissed her. It might have been the other way round. The 'who' and the 'how' were all a bit fuzzy, but it was that kiss that Pree was alluding to, when he claims he 'saw it happen'. John ran his fingers though his hair, still feeling the bartenders stare fixed on him.

"It was a mistake, that damn hooch of yours was to blame" he claimed, feeling a chill crawl across his skin remembering the moment he could have ruined everything that was good in his life. Thankfully that one kiss they shared had never been spoken of, never referenced, never even acknowledged, until now.

"I was so wasted, I'd have kissed Alvis if he had been here" Johnny quietly added, trying to rationalize his actions.

"Alvis was here, sat right where you are now, maybe you didn't see him because your attention was fully engaged elsewhere".

Johnny looked away, the regret of his actions weighing heavily across his shoulders. He would never admit it out loud, even struggled to admit it to himself, but he was in love with Dutch, had been since the moment he set eyes on her in that wedding dress.

Opportunities to tell her how he felt, came and went. Before he knew it, they had built a friendship that was way too important to risk on romance. He couldn't stop thinking back to when he first met her, it may have seemed as though she was the vulnerable one, but in truth he was the one who had been lost. Johnny had left his home, left his dying mother, left everyone he'd ever known, because of his father's damn debts, and moved half way across the J, alone. Dutch gave him someone to care about again, she very quickly became a friend and a family and they were just things he realized he couldn't live without.

He promted Pree to look over where Dutch sat, and they both watched as she laughed at something D'avin said, then playfully punched him in the arm.

"That's all I'm interested in Pree, if she is happy, then I'm happy. I can assure you the kiss was a mistake".

Johnny saw a fresh drink slide across the counter, stopping in front of him. He picked up the glass and thanked Pree, who looked on sadly.

"Damn killjoy, ain't that just depressing"

Johnny shrugged his shoulders in reply and swallowed down the drink. He truly believed that the kiss was stupid, that the kiss had been a mistake, but when he closed his eyes and remembered the taste of her lips and the smell of her skin, he knew that even with all those regrets, it would never change the fact that the kiss had been…. epic.


	3. The Escape Plan

**Place: Sowber**

**Time: Now**

"Ok, how do I look?" Dutch asked D'avin, as she let her hair down and made alterations to her outfit.

"Way too hot to pass as a sexer" he replied, shaking his head. He didn't like the plan they'd spent the last two hours concocting. It was long and complicated, and so many things could easily go wrong.

"I really think we should just grab him and run" he pleaded with her.

"This is going to work, D'av. He'll have more chance of survival if we get him into the departure chamber. Let's save your idea for plan B".

The departure chamber was one of the few constructed buildings on Sowber. With the crushing air quality on the surface, the chamber was mainly used by mineral buyers and mine owners who were forced to conduct business on ground level from time to time. Dutch had her portable oxygen tank, that she shared with D'av when he needed it, but if they stayed any longer than a day, they would need to go through the departure chamber before leaving. It pumped oxygen gradually through its systems, bringing peoples tolerance levels back up, ready for exiting the moon.

Dutch really didn't care if D'av liked the plan or not, it was the only decent one they could come up with. She would start with the sexers gathered in the bar and wasn't going to stop until she had a location on John. She took a deep breath of smoked filled air and headed towards a red-headed woman who caught her eye. She could tell that the girl with deep red curls was the boss of the little renter set up. She didn't look much older in years than her colleagues, but seemed to have a century of wisdom behind her eyes.

"What exactly can I do for you sweetheart?" the red-head asked, taking in every move Dutch made, while also eyeing up D'avin by the bar.

"My brother over there, just started working the mines. I've followed him here, if I am to stay on Sowber, I'm going to need a job" Dutch begged. The girl gave a wry smile while quietly weighing up the killjoy. She was looking to see if Dutch had the right stuff. Searching for a weakness, a frailty within her. Being a sexer was not an occupation for the weak of body or weak of mind, and Dutch certainly was neither of those things.

"You think you have the stomach for it?" the red-head asked, motioning to her co-workers draped over the local clientele. Dutch looked round at the dust covered miners, their rough hands mauling those who worked for Joy. She tried not to reveal just how fast she would break the fingers of anyone that touched her like that. Instead Dutch turned back to the woman and nodded.

"Ok, you can start tomorrow" she agreed, introducing herself as Rita, then started to explain the rules and rates, the protection and perks of the job. After a good twenty minutes of half listening, Dutch wasted no time and made her next move.

"Can I ask. Do you ever service the fighters?" Rita's eyes narrowed at the eagerness of Dutch's questions.

"Oh I see! Your one of those types of girls. You like the tough guys. Did you have any of them in mind?"

"There was one. I saw him fight today, does he…"

"Go and speak to Shay, she's John's favourite" The woman said, nodding over to a dark haired girl, sat a few tables over. "You might even have a chance with him, you certainly seem to be his type".

Dutch didn't know what Rita meant by 'his type' but the news that she had a lead on Johnny, eclipsed all other thoughts. Dutch quickly stood and shuffled her way over to where Shay sat. Half way around the tables, she felt rough hands touch her ass, pulling her close. She looked down at the pitiful miner, who had dared to touch her.

"Hey, baby you looked a little lonely there, how about some company?" the man slurred, looking up at her from his stool. Even with her back to D'avin, Dutch could feel her partner start to rise from his seat, ready to throw the dusty guy, head first down the nearest mine shaft. She hastily activated her comms.

"Hey, stay down boy, I think she's testing me." Dutch whispered over the comm-link. She had seen Rita staring at D'av, waiting to see if the over protected brother would dive in and save his sibling. It was clear that this small group of sexers only worked properly, if they could keep the drama to a minimum. Dutch took hold of the man's hands removing them firmly from her person and looked over to D'avin, letting him know she had things perfectly under control. She smiled down to the miner, her grip a little tighter than necessary.

"Well, I don't clock-on till tomorrow, but if you can pay twice the going rate, then I'm all yours tonight." she said, trying to added as much sweetness as she could muster into her tone. The man glanced over to Rita who just seem to shoo him away. Dutch's test was over and she seemed to have passed.

Shay was an attractive young thing hiding under a thick layer of make-up. She was sassy and certainly had her wits about her, as she gave Dutch the low-down on who's who in the bar. But Dutch didn't have time for local politics and swiftly steered the conversation round to John. After a little persuasion she even managed to get the girl to take her to where the younger Jacobi was staying.

Daylight had long since given way to darkness as the pair stepped out from the bar. With no electricity lighting the way ahead, Shay passed Dutch a lantern to help them find their path. The emitting glow was dull but it didn't seem to slow Shay was she paved the way down the narrow passages lined with living quarters. As they walked Shay filled the silence.

"If you are looking to sleep with him, then you'll be sorely disappointed" she bluntly stated. Dutch was a little taken aback by the comment, that idea was the furthest thing from her mind, yet as Shay had uttered the words, an image of the kiss she and John shared back at the Royale, flashed through her head. She felt a flush fill her cheeks at the memory, but shook it away and played along in her undercover role.

"Oh, I see, so he's exclusive to you?" Dutch asked, trying to sound a little disappointed and not really wanting to hear the answer.

"Gods No. Don't go telling the other girls, but he pays me more Joy just to keep him company and talk to him." She replied, then added.

"I'm mean he's no monk. I know he's bedded some of the other girls but they tend to be blonds, not dark haired, like me, so I'm guessing, you'll be the same, we kind of look a little similar, don't you think?" Dutch hadn't noticed it before, but after taking a moment to study Shay, she realized there were some similarities between then, both had long dark locks and were the same build.

"So if you only want to get in his bed, then you might want to find someone else, because I don't think it will happen" Shay concluded, not unkindly, just in her opinion. Dutch didn't need to answer; her new friend could tell just from her face; how important it was for her to see John. A little further on, through the darkness they came to a stop in front of a cave dwelling, Dutch realized this is where her best friend was.

"There are no guards here?" she wondered out loud. John had been forced into the arena, to fight, so why wasn't there anyone around to stop him from escaping?

"Well, he's not usually in any fit state to make a run for it after a fight. There are people who keep an eye on him, everyone see's everything that happens down these streets. Whomever is keeping him here would know he if tried to leave" Shay stated. She sounded well versed in the way the place was run. All this information was going to affect her escape plan and Dutch just had to hope John could come up with some idea's himself. She held the lantern out, offering it back to Shay for the return journey, but the girl shook her head.

"No, you keep hold of it, these cave dwellings don't hold much light, and you'll need it for when you come back later" Shay announced, then left Dutch alone while she disappeared back into the dark.

Wasting no time, Dutch knocked at the door, wondering if her first reaction to seeing John, would be to punch him or to hug him. After no answer came, she pushed forward until the entrance opened and stepped inside. It was pitch black, made more so as the door fell closed behind her. For a moment she thought Shay had made a mistake, brought her to the wrong place, but then she heard a rustling at the far end of the space. She held the lamp aloft letting the weak beam cast shadows around the room. There she saw him laid across a cot. His arm resting over his eyes.

"John! John thank the Trees?" she called quietly, shuffling across the room for a better view. But the sight only made her gasp, even in the bad light she could see just how much damage he'd taken in the fight. Dutch took a step closer bringing the illumination of the lamp with her.

"Hey, John, it's me, Dutch!" she announced gently, the words faltering upon seeing the shocking condition he was in. There was fierce bruising all across his ribs and hands. She could see a split down his lip. But it was the large gash down the side of his torso that was the real concern. Someone had been and stitched it up, but it had been the worst job she'd ever seen. That's when she realized John had been brought there to entertain the crowds and they really didn't care if he lived or died. The filthy surroundings were proof of that.

"Listen sweetheart, I don't need company right now, why don't you come back later". She heard him croak, from the bed, barely even recognizing his voice.

"I can't leave you like this" she said moving a hand towards him, but he batted her away before she could get close.

"Stop Shay! I don't need you here right now" he said with a little more aggression, causing Dutch to take a few steps backwards. He couldn't tell it was really her, maybe the Trix was still in his system. This was not good.

"Listen John, it's not Shay, it's me, your very pissed off partner. I've come to get you out of here, D'avin's outside too." She pleaded, but John was pulling himself to his feet, shaking his head refusing to believe any of it.

"I want you out now, don't keep saying you are her, she's not here" came a gruff response. He wasn't strong enough to be standing, but every time she tried to get him to sit back down he just pushed her away. His muscles strained as he used every ounce of strength to push himself upright against the furniture. When her back hit the wall beside the door, she lifted the lamp higher to illuminate her face hoping he could see it was her, but instead, she just saw the black of his eyes staring back, those lovely baby blues that always melted her heart were completely gone. Confirmation that Johnny was still completely loaded on Trix.

"St-stop saying you are her, You're not Dutch, you're just some silly girl, that I'm kind to from time to time. It doesn't give you the right to use the stuff we talk about to confuse me." John begged, leaning forward in an attempt to grab the door handle. His hand slipped and having nothing else to lean against, John fell into Dutch, his full weight crushing her against the wall. Dutch tried her best to hold him up but was struggling. His head fell to her shoulder and she gave a shiver as his warm breath tickled against her neck. She felt him breathe in deeply.

"Gods, you even smell like her" he hummed softly against her skin, just before passing out. Dutch felt the dead weight of his body, as his legs gave way. She moved her hand to hold him up by the waist but felt something wet. That gash to his side had split its makeshift stitches and blood was pouring from his wound.

Dutch crumbled to the floor with Johnny in her arms, her long and complicated escape plan had just been thrown out of the window, he was dying and they were running out of time. She connected her comms and desperately called for help.

D'avin! Get in here, screw my idea, we going to have to go with plan B".


	4. Daichi Junior

**Place: Westerley Old Town**

**Time: 7 Months Ago**

Lucy had been docked less than 10 minutes and John was already swiftly making his way through Old Town, ready to keep his appointment with a lovely young woman by the name of Curtsee. He wouldn't have been running so late if Lucy hadn't neglected to relay the message that the girl had changed the time of the meet. But what was done, was done and John's feet moved in double time to make up for it. As he passed through the bustle of the street, a familiar face suddenly fell into step beside him.

"Greetings, Jaqobis, do you have a moment to speak?" Alvis asked, that saintly tone of his getting into John's head as usual.

"Not really Alvis, I have an urgent appointment to keep, can it wait?"

"No, I need to speak to your partner, will she be heading this way soon?" the monk enquired, still managing to keep pace with the killjoy.

"Honestly I don't know, she's checking-in the latest warrant arrest with D'avin, not sure what she had planned after that." Johnny answered. But his guess would be the pair of them would be spending some alone time together on the ship. It seemed all their broken bridges were as good as mended, and although John was happy for them both, he really didn't need to be around it. He veered his thoughts away from his brother and best friend to notice Alvis' stride slow. There was deep concern written across the scarbacks face.

"Ok, I'll bite, why do you need to talk to her?" Johnny reluctantly asked, slowing his own pace to match.

"There's a man in town looking for her and I wanted to give her warning, he looked far from friendly". That's when John's pace stopped altogether. The monk now had his undivided attention.

"What man? What did he look like?" The fear that Khlyen was there, was so strong all thoughts of Curtsee and her big green eyes had vanished straight from his mind.

"I don't know… short, dark hair, psychotic grin" Alvis stated. John let out a breath, it couldn't be Khlyen, it didn't match his description.

"So did this guy leave a name?" John enquired feeling a lot less concerned. Dutch had made a hell of a load of enemies over the years, in fact they both had, but she never had a problem setting them straight when they reared their ugly heads.

"I think it was Daichi" Alvis replied, hesitantly . John thought about it for a moment then shook his head. It was not a name he recognized.

"I'll pass it on to Dutch if I see her first, thanks for the heads up", John said saying goodbye to the monk, watching as he slinked back into the shadows of the street.

As John turned to carry on walking, he saw Curtsee at the far end of the passage, the annoyance on her face was visible even from his distance. When he eventually reached the pretty blond, he caught an ear-full of her displeasure.

"Two hours, Killjoy, that's all I get before I have to return to Leith, and you turn up late" she expressed in a vexed tone. John just tilted his head to the side and flashed the cockiest of smiles.

"You know what they say, Good things come to those who wait". Then he slung his arm lazily around her shoulders and escorted the girl to the best luxury Old Town had to offer.

Decent hotel accommodation was hard to come by since the bombings, but luckily, a good chunk of the Royale's upper floor had survived. Of course Pawter had claimed one of the remaining rooms but it still left John with one of the others, that were usually rented out to sexers. Curtsee seemed less than impressed, the place was a far cry from the low cost rooms you would find on Leith, but John didn't care much. The place had a bed and the sheets were clean.

A good hour or so later Johnny lay back on the bed exhausted and satisfied, his bed fellow also seemed contented by the way she purred sleepily into the air. But happy as he was at that moment, something was nagging at the back of his mind. When he focused on the feeling, the earlier conversation with Alvis came to the forefront. That name Daichi, he hadn't recognized it, yet found himself visualizing the letters of the name in his head, rearranging them, changing them, listening to the way they sounded. Then he saw it, so bright and clear right in front of his eyes. John lurched forward in the bed, a cold chill ran down his hot skin.

"Oh Shit!" he called, a little louder than intended, waking his lover from her slumber. Before she had time to protest the interruption, John was already on his feet, hastily pulling on his pants.

"I'm so sorry Curtsee, but I've got to split" John apologized, leaning across the bed and giving her one last kiss, stopping the lecture she was about to give. Then he pulled on his shoes, grabbed his shirt from the chair, and quickly dived from the room, heading for the downstairs bar. While launching himself down the staircase, he did not see Dutch climbing up opposite and flew into her with force. Both reached out grabbing each other for stability, saving themselves from careering down the steps.

"Hey, take it easy!" he heard her say. John looked down to feel Dutch's hands still gripping at his body. He felt a spark of electricity across his skin from her light touch, but desperately tried not to react to the feeling. No good could come from letting that sensation in.

"You feel really warm" she observed moving her hand across the front of his bare chest.

"Yeah, I've just been…. exercising" he replied, coyly, motioning back to the room he had just exited. It seemed to take a second for Dutch to understand his meaning, but once she did, her hand pulled back as though the electricity he could feel had given her a shock. He looked at her and swore he saw a blush for the briefest of seconds. But the moment was quickly gone and her tough exterior returned.

"Of course, I'd almost forgotten about your date with Curtsee" she said. He could hear the venom in her voice as she said the girls name. Johnny rolled his eyes, he knew the speech that was coming next.

"I don't know why you even entertain her. She comes slumming it on Westerely and only sees you as a bit of rough, John. That girl has zero respect for you…" Johnny let her go on a little longer. His partner always seemed to have an opinion on the girls he occasionally hooked up with. But today he didn't have the time to listen to it all.

"Jeez, Dutch, give it a rest. We meet up a couple of times a year, I'm not about to go and ask her to marry me or anything" he bit back, finally pulling the shirt over his head.

"Why are you up here anyway?" he added. There really wasn't a whole lot of reasons to be climbing the stairs of the Royale.

"Quick visit to Pawter" she replied, holding out a temporary bandaged wrist to show John. He took hold of her arm, moving the material to reveal a large angry looking cut just above her wrist. He could feel her shiver as his fingers gently inspected the damage and forced himself once again to ignore the feeling.

"It doesn't look too bad, D'av could have fixed that right up, back on the ship" he stated, knowing exactly what Lucy had on board in the form of a med kit. Dutch looked up at him a little sheepishly and explained how she had caught the edge of one of the crates on the cargo deck.

"We were moving the cases away from the rear exit. They were really heavy John. If I'd have stayed on board and let D'av patch me up, I'd be back there now still moving them" she said.

"So you jumped ship, hoping that by the time you returned, D'avin would have moved them all for you. You are such a shirker" John joked. He punched her playfully in the shoulder then ordered her to go and get the wound sorted. Once she was out of sight, he jumped down the remaining steps into the bar.

"Hey Pree, have you seen our shady friend…." The bartenders eyes moved to the far side of the bar, a dark area, still piled high with rubble that hadn't yet been cleared out. Johnny turned to see Alvis sat at a small table there. He quickly shifted over, sitting opposite the man 'The Company' thought had been executed during the bombings.

"Did you see Dutch come in?" John quickly asked, to which the scarback nodded.

"Did you tell her about the man who is looking for her?"

"Didn't get chance to, Why? Do you think you know who he is?" Alvis asked, leaning forward. John wished he didn't, but all it took was a different pronunciation from the name Alvis had given him. He did indeed know the man called Daichi , from way back home. A pretty nasty gangster whom he'd had to deal with, whilst trying to sort his father's debt. There had been a couple of other times they'd crossed paths over the years, but it was unusual for the man to venture so far away from the home planet.

"Do you know if he's on Westerley now? When did you last see him?" John's frantic questioning started to worry Alvis, Johnny could see it in his face. He knew the monk saw himself as protector to the people and could plainly see he was not happy to hear about some new threat. But before Alvis had the chance to answer the questions, Johnny heard the bar door creep open and someone walk slowly in. Without looking he knew it was Daichi, but it wasn't until the man spoke, that a true fear tore through the Killjoy. The man at the bar was Daichi's son, every bit the gangster his father was , but without the restraint. This man was sociopathic, unstable and just plain evil. John grabbed hold of Alvis' arm, forcing him to look him in the eye.

"Dutch is in with Pawter, go up there and do whatever it takes, to stop her coming down here. I'll sort this out, Alvis, I'll fix it". As the scarback swiftly followed the request, John turned to face the man he'd always known as Junior and saw the spark of recognition in his eye.

"Johnny Jaqobis, is that you? Well you weren't the one I came for, but you'll do for now. "'


	5. That stupid kiss

**Place: Sowber**

**Time: Now**

Dutch knelt by John's side and tore the bed sheets into strips.

"How on earth did you get here, Johnny? She whispered to herself, whilst looking down at the boy who was still unconscious from a bloody wound. She tightly bound the injury with the torn sheets and held back several emotions that were threatening to bubble over. Dutch rarely did 'vulnerability' and it was only John who got to see her that way. The younger Jaqobis had seen her at her lowest. When she couldn't sleep, it was Johnny's room she ran to for comfort and she had even allowed him to find her, crouched down by the bulkheads, beaten and bruised after the time D'avin tried to kill her.

But even though the two were alone in that filthy cave, she could not let herself fall apart, not when his big brother was moments away.

Dutch's relationship with the two brothers, differed greatly. There was no doubt that she cared for D'avin and had shared his bed on many occasions over past months, but even with that intimacy, she had never let him close, not the way she did with John. The last few months had just proved to Dutch that Johnny Jaqobis was someone she just couldn't live without. The fact that he left seven months ago, without so much as a goodbye, had hurt her more than any injury she had ever sustained.

"I'm about five minutes out. How are you doing?" she heard D'av report over the comms link.

"Just get here faster" was all the reply she could manage.

John's makeshift bandages seemed to be holding and his breathing was strong and steady, so all Dutch could do was sit back and count down the minutes until help arrived. In the silence of the room her mind began to wonder, trying to understand why John was living on that hellhole of a rock. She was so angry with him for leaving all those months ago. Pree had relayed half a story, about John being offered 4 month's work, that was just too good to pass up. But he had been gone almost twice as long and never attempted to make contact. They were supposed to be a team, more than that, they were like family to each other, so how could he just have left her, without a second thought?

She prayed that the damn, stupid kiss they had shared months ago, had not played a part in his decision to leave. They had never spoken about that night at the Royale and had done a fairly good job at pretending it never happened. But for all their efforts to ignore it, little things had still changed about their relationship. Dutch had found herself avoiding contact with him, it seemed the smallest of touches, a brush of shoulders would send a spark coursing through her body. She'd also stopped calling on him, when she couldn't sleep. Just lying beside him, made her feel things she wasn't sure how to handle. That one single kiss was something that could never be taken back and she hoped that one moment wasn't responsible for losing her best friend.

That night in the Royale pushed its way to the forefront of her mind, just as it had so many times before. The pair of them had been so very drunk on Pree's home brew and their intoxication had been consciously done. They drank in honor of those poor souls they had found under the bombed debris of Old Town. Dutch had spent most of that evening watching John barely hold it together, as he came across familiar faces, buried under huge chunks of rubble. Faces he had become friendly with over the years. The same faces that Dutch, in comparison, had barely taken the time to acknowledge. John had heaved the rocks until his strength waned and Dutch had to drag him away, before his body gave out from under him.

The strong alcohol did a good job of easing the pains of the body as well of the heart. And Dutch found herself desperately wanting to feel some of that goodness and compassion that Johnny possessed. She wondered if she touched his lips with her own, would some of his humanity flow her way. It was then Dutch leaned across the table and kissed him.

It felt like a mistake the second she tasted his lips and quickly pulled away.

But John reached out and dragged her chair closer to him, so close she was almost sitting on his lap. He ran a thumb gently along her jaw line to the edge of her chin, beckoning her forward. Maybe it was the alcohol, but she was suddenly powerless to resist. John's head moved nearer, until she could feel his breath mix with her own. She could see the conflict in his expression. Need and hunger was equally matched against fear. In that moment she could read his thoughts, for they mirrored her own. There was a reason they have never crossed the line. Their relationship was rock solid, it worked because it hadn't been complicated by sex or desire. But as she sat there feeling her own heartbeat in flux, she could sense those solid foundations turn into a fragile glass sphere that surrounded them. When John closed the gap and kissed her back, the sphere shatter into a thousand pieces and Dutch could do nothing but dissolve into his embrace.

There was a thick taste moonshine on his lips, along with something else, something indescribable, something that was just …. John - and damn, it was addictive. Nobody had ever kissed her like that before. Dutch was feisty and strong and her romances pretty much matched those qualities. But John's touch was so reverent, so slow and deliberate that she just gave in to the sensation. For those endless minutes, she was completely lost to him, unaware of anything other than the rhythm of his heart, that beat as erratic as her own. Eventually John pulled back, leaving her feel a chill at the absence of his body pressed against her own. That conflicted expression was still there, only now the fear in his eyes had increased. Fear of what they had just done. In panic, John quickly stood up, sending his chair toppling backwards. Neither could find words to say to each other. He hesitated where he stood, those blue eyes twinkling in the dimly lit bar. In no more than a whisper she heard him apologize, then he was gone from the room.

Dutch was left to deal with a head full of confused feelings, but instead of trying to sort them out, she opted to drown them in the remaining alcohol, until her head dipped, leaning against the table top and her eyes closed soon after.

Dutch wanted to stay within the memory a little longer and remember the taste of his lips, but a noise from outside the cave brought her head back to the present reality. The door slowly opened and D'avin stepped inside the room. She sighed with relief at the sight of him, it was finally time to get moving and she took a minute to get her head back in the game.

D'avin rushed over to his unconscious brother and knelt by his side. A barrage of curse words fell from his mouth as he studied the state of his brother's injuries, anger rising up, at not knowing who was responsible for it.

"Ok, so what's the new plan?" he asked, through gritted teeth.

"We carry him out of here, run like hell and shoot anything that comes within three feet of us" she replied. D'avin managed a little smile at that. It was most definitely his kind of plan.

"When we're on the ship, we shove him into a space suit, secure it, then reduce the air supply running through it. Hopefully it will help combat the difference in atmospheric pressures. At least until we can get him some proper help." D'avin nodded his acceptance of the plan, trying not to think about the chances of it actually working. But they had little other options. In John's condition, he just wouldn't make it through the departure chamber, so all they could do was make a run for it.

Then the door of John's room opened again and Shay shyly stepped inside. Dutch glared at D'avin realizing he had brought the young sexer along with him.

"What the hell is she doing here?"

"I couldn't find you without her. It's pitch black out there and all these streets look the same." he argued back, matching Dutch's tone.

The girl moved further into the room, ignoring the bickering pair and took a moment to concern herself with John.

"Where are you taking him?" she asked suspiciously. Watching the two, preparing to lift his body off the floor. Dutch took a deep breath and screwed her eyes shut with frustration. She didn't need someone else there, complicating matters, especially someone she had no intention of ever seeing again once they,d left the moon. But before biting back at the girl, Dutch stopped herself. Shay had been a friend to John, may have even helped him stay alive and she at least deserved an answer to her question.

"We are taking him home; Shay. He doesn't belong here; he belongs to us." Dutch stated, while helping D'avin pull John to his feet.

"I'll help you get out of here, if you take me with you." Shay said in an almost begging tone. Both the Killjoys stop heaving John's heavy body over their shoulders and stared up at the young sexer. There was no way they were taking extra passengers. They didn't know what trouble would be following them in the wake of the escape, they didn't need a whole lot of other people looking for her as well. Shay seemed to read their thoughts and pleaded her case.

"I have no ties here, no family, no debt. Nobody will miss me, except maybe a couple of my regular clients. I know these streets; I know the fastest way to the Landing port. I can get us there without getting caught." Dutch could feel D'avin's eyes on her, waiting on her to make a decision. It was clear D'av wanted to let the girl come. The bottom line was, if it could help save John's life, then they were doing it. Dutch looked sternly at the young girl, making it clear who made the rules in the little group.

"Right, Shay. You and I will carry Johnny. D'av can take lead, weapon at the ready" Dutch instructed, but caught D'avin shaking his head.

"I'm stronger than you, we'll move faster if I help carry him, Dutch" he protested, but she was not having any of it. After 7 long months she finally had her best friend back, there was no way she was breaking contact with him for even a second, till they were aboard Lucy and a thousand miles away from Sowber.

The trek through the streets was fairly straight forward, even though Johnny was heavy. The three of them worked together well. The only break in silence was from Shay's directional instructions, sending them through a multitude of turns, down the maze of streets. Their eyes gradually adapted to the darkness and soon they were just minutes out from the landing port.

It was D'av who broke the silence next, when he radioed-in to Lucy over his comms.

"Hey Luce, we're coming in hot, get ready for departure, I want us off this rock the second we are on board"

_"I cannot do that D'avin. The ship is land locked until a full ship scan is completed on the request of departure._

It turned out that the illegal removal of Sowber's precious metal was punishable by death. So a full scan of any ship departing was mandatory to ensure no metal was stolen.

"Get them to start the scan now, Lucy"

_"I cannot do that until everything and everyone is on board, it is against protocol"_

"We don't give a crap about stealing any damn chunk of metal, just get it underway" D'avin called desperately, but Dutch knew there was only one way to get Lucy, to break protocol.

"We have Johnny!" she quietly proclaimed over the comms link, then waited for a response.

_"You have John Jaqobis with you?" Lucy asked back for clarification_

"Yes".

There followed a good minute of silence before Lucy returned and the little group held their breaths for the answer.

_"Departure scan has been requested and will commence in two minutes"_

D'avin looked back at Dutch who shrugged her shoulders, trying once again not to show the jealously she felt toward that damn ship.

The narrow streets disappeared and the open dust flats of the landing port suddenly came into view. Dutch, lifted John a little higher over her shoulder and felt her spirits lift with him. They heard the rumble of Lucy's engines come to life and D'avin helped carry Johnny the remaining distance, as the three of them ran flat out towards the open cargo bay.

As all bodies clambered aboard, Lucy pulled away from the surface and broke out of the atmosphere, leaving a host of warning sirens blaring across the Sowber plains, at the illegal departure. As Dutch helped D'avin rapidly get John and Shay into the space suits, she knew the easy bit was done. Next she was going to find out who had done this to John and make them wish they had never been born.


	6. Almost made it.

**Place: Old Town**

**Time: 7 months ago**

Once Alvis had safely disappeared to the upper floor of the Royale, to distract Dutch, John walked over to where Daichi Junior stood by the bar. His only aim was to get the short-tempered man out of the room as quick as possible. Get him out before either Dutch came down those stairs or D'Avin walked through the front door. He really didn't want anyone he loved, getting entangled with the man he'd witnessed do unspeakable acts to his fellow human beings.

"Hello, Junior. You seem to be a long way from home" John greeted, trying to keep his words light and simple. In the past he'd watched the short man take offence to the most benign comments, then turn on the spokesperson violently.

"I am a very long way from home, as are you Johnny-boy, but I have business here, business with that partner of yours. So where is she?"

"Not sure" John Shrugged. "She could be gone for days. Is there something I can help you with?"

"I've come to discuss Uncle Varci with her" Junior stated, his eyes, starting to lose some of the friendliness they held moments earlier.

'Uncle Varci' had been a level 3 warrant Dutch and John had accepted a couple of years before. It was a simple job, find him and bring him in alive. They had no clue who had put out the warrant on him and if they'd known he was related to the Daichi family, John would had insisted they stay well clear of it.

At the time, the warrant had gone like clockwork, Varci had been locked and served, within forty-eight hours. But then, as they exited Lucy and onto the prison transport station, the guy tried to run and stumbled over the side of a flight of stairs. He might have even survived if he hadn't been cuffed at the time. A death while in custody of a RAC agent meant a full inquest was carried out, that's when it became general knowledge that Daichi Senior was the warrant holder.

"It was accidental death, Junior, even your father accepted the verdict, once all the evidence was presented. Does he even know you are here?"

"He's dead, John. And Yeah, he may have accepted the verdict, but _I_ never did. So that's why I'm here, I'm head of the family now and I want some recompense for my Uncle's death" Junior announced.

John felt sick at hearing that the one person who could keep a leash on the maniac stood in front of him, had passed away. The whole situation just seemed to be going from bad to worse.

"What exactly do you want Junior? What do you want Dutch to do?" John asked, bored with trying to tiptoe around the guy.

"Well, Uncle Varci died holding on to a lot of secrets. He had names of people who betrayed my family. It's taken years to get that information from other sources. But now I have the list of names, I just need someone to go and bring them in" Junior began, a sneer forming on his lips as he continued to speak.

"Now all I need is a smart-mouthed, cocky little bitch, that got my Uncle killed, to go out and track the traitors down".

John felt his hands pump in to fists at hearing the man describe Dutch in such a way. Then he was forced to think about the options available. The bottom line was that Dutch could snap a man like Junior in half. In a straight fight there really was no contest. But the little psycho liked to play dirty and he was sure that although Dutch would win the fight, she wouldn't come out unscathed. Getting her involved was not an option.

"You don't need Dutch; I'll find your people" John eventually suggested, after giving it some thought. It seemed to be a good suggestion. He was a damn good killjoy, finding people was what he did for a living. But an added bonus would be that John could probably do with some time away from both Dutch and D'avin. He loved them both and hoped they could make each other happy, but he couldn't deny that it was getting harder and harder for him to see them together. Maybe some distance would help him get his head straight.

"No I want the girl, she's the one who accepted the warrant, it's her that needs to pay" Junior said, shaking his head at the proposal. But the more John thought about it, the more he convinced himself it was the right move.

"We _both_ accepted the warrant, we were _both_ there to lay hands on Varci, we _both_ witnessed him make a run for it and tumble over the staircase" John pointed out, "We are equally responsible for every action that day. Now, I'm here, a willing volunteer, to find these people for you. I can get the job done."

Junior narrowed his eyes and tilted his head, a sure sign he was contemplating the offer. John stood, silently praying for the man to make the right choice.

"Oh, I know you can get the job done. I remember some of the things you 'got done' back home, sorting out those family debts". He said, making John feel sick to the stomach, recalling some of the things he'd done in his past.

"Two conditions. I own you for four months. You will do whatever I ask in that time. If you refuse to carry out anything in those four months, I'll come straight back here to pick up your girl. Maybe I'll even do some damage to that pretty doctor upstairs, or that big dumb brother of yours" Junior added, making it crystal clear he hadn't just blindly walked into that bar. Daichi Junior had done his homework and knew exactly who was important in John's life. Four months was a long time, but with that last comment, he had no other choice.

"What's the other condition?"

"You have to leave with me right now" Junior replied, grinning wickedly.

John felt Pree shift in his peripheral vision, and realized that the bartender had been eves-dropping the whole time. That made things a lot easier.

"Ok, just one last drink" he requested and when Junior didn't protest, John stepped back towards where Pree was already pouring an expensive looking Hokk. John took hold of the glass and stared down at it for a moment, then began to whisper rapidly to the barman.

"You tell Dutch, I took a job that was too good to turn down." He began, and took a sip from the amber liquid. "If D'av can work my warrants without the RAC finding out, then I might still have a job when I get back. But most importantly, do not let them come looking for me. I'm doing this, so my brother and Dutch can have a bit of peace, they need it after everything they've been through" John added, then swallowed the last of the drink before finishing his speech.

"If you let them come for me, there was no point to this damn sacrifice" he concluded and watched Pree nod sadly to his understanding of the request.

John then followed Daichi Junior out of the royale and straight aboard the Charon. A huge ugly ship docked way out in the badlands.

As he walked down one of the ships vast corridor's he was swiftly pushed into a storage hold by one of Junior's men, then took a punch to the face, He dropped to his knees only to see Junior standing over him, stabbing a needle into his shoulder.

"Sorry about this John, but I just need to check a few things before we embark on our journey." He said holding the needle up for John to see.

"It's a truth drug. It kind of hurts, but dies down after about fifteen minutes" he added, as John felt a burn spread through his body, making it harder for him to concentrate on his surroundings.

"So let's begin. An easy one to start with. Did you once shoot my cousin in the knee, back home?" John hated that Junior felt the need to keep mentioning their past, but even as he tried to deny the man an answer to his question, he felt a liquid fire intensify through his veins forcing a response from his lips.

"Yes!" Junior smiled, pleased at getting the response he had expected.

"Great! So down to business. Did you kill my Uncle Varci, that day at the prison transport station?"

"No" John replied through gritted teeth, as he writhed from the fiery pain he felt in every inch of his body.

"Ok, I believe you. So did that bitch partner of yours kill my Uncle Varci?"

"No" came the response again, but this time John tried to take a swing at Junior. He really didn't like how he used 'that word' to describe Dutch. The attempt failed when the pain was just too much to bear.

Junior crouched down beside him and stared intensely, as he cried out in pain. John felt like the man was staring into his soul, looking for some other kind of truth.

"That partner of yours. You're in love with her aren't you?" Junior said. The question was more of an observation, a rhetorical thought, yet the truth drug didn't seem to care. John felt the pain increase as he fought against the word rising in this throat. The more he tried, the more fire he felt. In the end he couldn't stop it.

"Yes." He growled with frustration, only to hear Junior roar with laughter in reply"

"Well that's one priceless bit of information to have" he said standing and making his way to the door.

"The ordeal's over John. I just needed to know I can trust you. To make sure you weren't part of some conspiracy to stop me finding these traitors. Get a good night's sleep and dream of that girl of yours, because tomorrow, you get to work" Junior said then left the room.

John took deep breaths as he lay flat against the cold metal floor, he took Junior's advice and let images of Dutch fill his mind as he closed his eyes, feeling the pain eventually wane, until he fell asleep from exhaustion.

* * *

 

**Three and a half months later**

The work John found himself doing for Junior was hard but nothing he couldn't handle. He found all the people on the list and brought them in. Every time he had an attack of conscience, he forced himself to see, that most were as corrupt at Daichi himself and that if he didn't bring them in, then the guy would make good on the promise to go back to old town and hurt everyone John loved. So whenever Johnny found his work a little hard to take, he just concentrated of his RAC oath and found himself quoting the one simple code, to help him get through it.

'The Warrant is all.'

With just two weeks left to go, until his time was spent. John found himself hunting down some equipment that Junior was keen to get his hands on. He'd been on a trail for a couple of days, when he found the item in question, but as he opened the box to glance at the tech inside, he felt his stomach drop to the floor.

A genetic bomb. Just like the one he'd seen used, twice before on Qresh and the Leith farmlands. John crumbled to the floor with the weapon in his hands as he tried to come to terms with what that meant. He was so damn close to the four months. So close to being able to go home.

But he couldn't let Junior get hold of a weapon like that. The mass damage he could cause was not worth thinking about. He screamed at himself, realizing he was about to put everyone in Old Town in danger but he really had no option. Then took hold of the weapon, hurling it with as much force as he could muster against a solid wall, letting it smash into pieces to the floor.

"I'm so sorry Dutch" he whispered out loud, then turned and headed back to the Charon to face Junior and the consequences of his actions.


	7. Insights

**Place: On board Lucy**

**Time: Now**

"So any bright ideas?" Dutch desperately asked D'avin as the pair sat on the bridge of Lucy, the mineral moon of Sowber, fast becoming a distant star.

John was still unconscious, laid out in one of the empty berths on board, strapped securely into a space suit. A steady but reduced air flow pumped through the suit's circulatory system. Shay; the young sexer they had picked up from the moon was with him, dressed head to foot in identical clothing. Neither could survive long in the suits, especially John with all the injuries he had sustained. They needed proper medical care, and they needed it quickly, but their go-to-girl, a certain Illenore Pawter Simms, was just too far out across the J to offer support.

D'avin stared at the J star-cluster charts on a screen in front him, judging distances between the nearest systems.

"There might be someone" he hesitantly began. "A field medic I trained with about ten years ago. He lives within the Union Republic system. He might help us." There was an uncertainty in his tone, something that Dutch chose not to hear. They were short on options and she was happy to cling to the smallest of hopes.

"Ok, you go down to the communication hub, and start making calls, see what you can come up with. I'll stay here and….." Dutch began but was interrupted by Lucy.

_'It seems there is some commotion in berth six, John appears to have woken up."_

Both D'avin and Dutch jump to their feet, ready to run towards the younger Jaqobis, but Dutch halted them both. She needed to keep her head on straight, stay calm and focused. She turned to D'avin and saw the concern he had for his brother. Placing a caring hand to cradle his cheek, she spoke softly.

"We really need that medical help and you're the only one who can get it. We just can't afford any delays. I'll see to John and make sure he is all right, you need to go and make those calls." she said, watching D'avin weigh the options for the briefest of seconds. Balancing the need to check on his brother against getting the medical help to save his life. He knew what he needed to do, he just wished he could do both. Eventually he nodded to confirm Dutch's request and turned to walk to the communication hub.

"Keep your comms open D'av, so I can call on you quickly if need be." She added before turning to leave in the opposite direction.

Shay's muffled shouts could be heard at the far end of the corridor and caused Dutch to quicken her pace towards berth six. There was a panic in the young girl's tone, that clearly meant all was not well in the room. Upon entering she saw John, standing on his feet. Something that should be an impossibility considering his condition.

"Got to get back…just two weeks left….in danger if I don't go back…" John muttered through ragged breaths. Shay was trying to calm him, trying her best to get him to sit back down, but John was more than a little agitated.

Dutch walked further into the room, assessing them both. It was evident the suits weren't working, both were struggling to breathe. Not only was the reduced oxygen a weak substitute for the air on Sowber, but it was also far from being an infinite supply. The air tanks were small, and if they continued to exert themselves as they were currently doing, neither would make it far enough to get proper help, regardless of whether or not D'av was successful in his task.

"Hey! John, you have to calm down, why don't you do what Shay asked and take a seat?" Dutch said making her appearance known for the first time. John looked up, shock and disbelief clear in his expression.

"Dutch? You-You're here? You're safe? She heard him ask with relief, struggling to trust his own eyes.

"And my brother?"

"He's here, he's safe too" she replied, then once again urged him to sit down.

It was troubling that John had no recollection of seeing her just hours earlier, back in that filthy cave he'd been living in. But what concerned her more, was the wound he had sustained on Sowber, the one that had split its stiches and gushed blood just before he passed out. She couldn't see the injury beneath the thick space suit and didn't know just how well her makeshift bandage was holding.

John wouldn't sit down, he just continued to stand, trying to take it all in, trying to piece together the holes in his memory.

"I have to go back. I made a deal Dutch, four months for your safety, he'll come for you all if I don't honor the deal" he explained. Dutch moved forward again, confused by his words. This was very much the story she wanted to hear, but John was in no fit state to tell it. Instead she kept her reply short.

"Four months? John, you've been gone seven. After you didn't return, D'av and I came searching for you. It's taken this long to find you" she said, feeling sick, realizing just how much damage the Trix drug had done to him.

That's when her partner took a turn for the worse, his breathing became even more erratic, she could see condensation fog the inside of his helmet. Coming to terms with the missing time was just too much and John desperately pulled at his helmet, twisting the latches, hoping to find relief by taking it off.

"No!"

Both Dutch and Shay shouted together, running towards him. It really did hurt her to see him that way. Part of her just wanted to pull him close and wrap herself around him, but Dutch had never really been that touchy-feely kind of person. But she needed to do something, especially once John had the helmet clear and had fallen to his knees.

"Sev…seven?" he tried to ask, just not grasping the length of time he could not recall. Dutch was down in front of him, staring into those glistening blue eyes. She grabbed for the helmet, but John pushed it back away. He could hardly find breath and Dutch was on the edge of panicking, she needed to act fast. Straightening up a little, the feisty brunette balled her hand in to a fist.

"I only do this because I care" she said, then let loose a right hook across his jaw, knocking the boy clean out.

She heard Shay gasp in horror, but ignored it while frantically re-attaching John's helmet. "D'avin came running in, hearing the commotion over the comms. He helped Dutch lift Johnny back on to the bed. She could see him wanting to question the necessity of her actions, but really wasn't in the mood to explain herself. Instead Dutch just looked up at the elder brother, her own silent question desperately needing an answer.

"I made contact. I have us a doctor who will help. He's on the Union Republic's central planet" D'av announced, reading Dutch's thoughts and watching her give a huge sigh of relief.

"Thank the tree's!" Dutch breathed out, grateful that something was finally going their way.

"Lucy! Punch in the co-ordinates and let's get on our way" she called to the ship, then turned her attention to Shay, walking the shocked girl down to the next empty room and letting D'av have some time with his brother.

For once she could see a solid plan forming and began considering the next steps in her head, while Shay sat quietly, regaining some modicum of calm. Once John had received the health care he needed, then she would get her answers. She would find out the full story of why he was dumbed on that pit of a moon and who had pumped him full of drugs. As the killjoy busied herself trying to anticipate the next problem they would need to overcome, Shay spoke.

"You're her, aren't you? The one John always spoke of" the young girl said, but Dutch shook her head, not following what Shay was getting at.

"After the fights on Sowber, when I went to keep John company, he would tell me stories about a girl. Always the same girl, always you."

"John has never been short of friends that are women, He could have been speaking about anyone. I'm sure you are mistaken…." Dutch replied, putting Shay straight on the matter.

"I'm not mistaken, I saw the way he looked at you just now, you're the girl that kept him alive all these months. Going home to you was the only thing that kept him going"

Dutch just continued to shake her head refusing to believe any of it, but Shay hadn't finished.

"I assumed you and D'avin were a couple, you both seem pretty close, but then I saw you in that room just now. I saw it in your eyes Dutch, I saw how much pain you are in seeing him like that, I saw just how much you care for him". Dutch stood and took a few steps away from Shay; almost fearful of the girl who seemed to have so much insight on her relationship with John. Those kind of feelings were private and Dutch's first instinct were to deny them all.

"Listen Shay, John and I have known each other a long time, all you witnessed back there were two friends who have missed each other, nothing more" Dutch insisted, wanting to exit out of the conversation as soon as possible.

"So, do you mean you and D'avin are together?" Shay finally asked, trying to piece together the puzzle of the little trio.

"No… I mean we were for a while but…. We just couldn't be, what each other really needed" she concluded, not elaborating any further. Then Dutch stepped from the room, before the girl made her start to analyse her feelings further.

* * *

 

Next door, D'avin sat next to where his brother lay. His comms link was still active and he'd just been privy to Shay and Dutch's entire conversation. With his head in his hands D'avin just shook his head repeatedly.

A dozen moments from the past couple of years filtered through his brain, revealing new meaning's to conversations he'd had and scenes he had witnessed. The main conclusion he had come to, was that he'd been a pretty shitty brother.

Right from the start, Johnny had expressed the importance of their little team. The importance of working together and specifically asked him not to mess it up, by sleeping with Dutch. But he had gone on to do that exact thing, even after promising he wouldn't. If D'avin had taken a second to read below the surface of John's speech, he could have taken a guess that his brother had feelings for the girl.

Growing up, the brothers had been pretty close, and D'av was well aware they tended to go for the same type of woman. If he saw Dutch as the 'hot as hell', amazing woman that she was, then there was a high possibility that Johnny thought the same way. But he'd selfishly ignored all that and made his move on Dutch anyway. Rationalizing his actions by assuming she couldn't have felt the same way towards Johnny, otherwise the two of them would have been together.

But over the last few months, his opinion on that matter had been challenged, especially after witnessing Dutch's growing short temper, in the wake of Johnny's absence. Her behavior could be likened to someone going through withdrawal. Irritable and angry and ready to blow at any given moment.

The incident that stood out most in his mind was the day he had to stop her from ripping Lucy apart.

Dutch had been working under the floor grates on Lucy, fixing some blown electronics near the cargo bay. She had been down there for hours, trying to correct an issue that effected the internal doors aboard the ship. After a lot of hard work, Dutch had asked Lucy if the issues were fixed.

_"All systems are now operational"_ came the response as Dutch sighed with relief, climbing out of the whole in the ground.

" _But it's not the way John would have done it"_ Lucy felt the need to add to her statement, for some unknown reason. At that point Dutch just exploded.

"Well John's not bloody-well here, is he? You ungrateful little…." She threw the wrench in her hand with great force towards the nearest bulk head, hearing a satisfying clank as it made contact. But it didn't stop there, a red mist filled Dutch's vision and she ran towards Lucy's walls ready to tear the thing to pieces, until D'avin managed to catch her mid launch, wrapping his arms around her waist and keeping her away until the anger had passed.

There had been other times like that, where the smallest mention of John had forced a reaction from Dutch. And putting it together with the conversation he'd overheard in the next room, things were starting to make more sense. D'avin looked over at his sibling laid out, unconscious in that space suit.

"Hey, little brother, hang in there. We're going to get you some help. Then, when you are well again, you're going to have to tell me, what the hell is going on between the two of you?" He said.

D'avin Jaqobis cared deeply for Dutch, and probably always would. But she was right to tell Shay, they couldn't be what each other needed. Although he had no idea who might be the right person for him, he was starting to realise that Dutch just might have found hers. All the girl needed to do was realise it herself.

" _We are within Union Republic airspace and are approaching our destination_ " Lucy announced suddenly bringing D'avin away from his thoughts.

He got up, leaving Johnny still sleeping and joined Dutch on the bridge, ready for their descent to the planet. Before long John and Shay would be receiving the care they desperately needed. Now all D'avin had to do was explain to the killjoy next to him, what exactly he had agreed to do in exchange for that help.


	8. Misread situations

**Place: Union Republic**

**Time: Now**

"Hey!" Shay greeted, walking into Johnny's hospital room and looking the picture of health. The girl was clean, well fed and had a good color in her cheeks. A complete change from the sickly constitution living on Sowber had ingrained in her.

"You're looking good" she added, seeing the same improvements in Johnny as he sat up, legs dangling over the side of the bed.

"I always look good Shay" John replied, flashing a particularly flirtatious smile.

In the ten days he'd been in hospital, Shay had pretty much been his only visitor, apart from medical staff. He hadn't seen his brother or Dutch since regaining consciousness, apparently they were out on a job. Something they had agreed to do, in exchange for the treatment he received.

John was grateful for the care. His recovery had been quite miraculous. It had taken a full day to re-acclimatize to the standard air pressure and another two days of laser treatment to deal with the cuts and bruises that covered his body. But the deep gash he'd sustained to his side was taking considerably longer to heal. The severity of the injury, infection and extensive blood loss, meant it was beyond the modern technologies on offer at the hospital.

But Shay had been there every step of the way and even though they'd known each other a good few months on Sowber, Johnny felt like he was meeting her for the first time. Those drugs forced upon him during the fights, had really messed with his head. Every recollection was fragmented, as though Shay had been no more than a fuzzy dream. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't piece together a complete memory. Those months were simply lost to him, maybe forever. John felt his grip on the bed frame tighten, as thoughts of Daichi Junior flooded his mind. He was the man responsible for all this and he was going to pay for it.

The crazy, paranoid crime lord would surely know about the escape from Sowber and John recalled the deal he had promised all those months ago. Four months' work in exchange for leaving Dutch alone. Four months of doing whatever Junior asked of him. But regardless of the extra time he had done on Sowber, it didn't change the fact that John broke the deal, the moment he refused to hand over that genetic bomb.

He prayed that while being holed up in that hospital, Daichi Junior hadn't found his way back to Westerley Old Town to seek out Pawter and his other friends.

"You're leaving aren't you?" Shay commented, looking at John's white knuckle grip on the bedframe and bringing him out of his own thoughts. John hadn't realized just how easy his fear was to read.

"Yeah! As soon as D'avin and Dutch come back, I kind of have to" he answered, standing up from the bed and shuffling slowly a few feet across the room, to pour a glass of water.

He felt the dull ache of pain with every move across the floor and took deep slow breaths to combat the lightheadedness that had instilled itself. But he still pushed on. The need to prove he was fit enough to walk out of the hospital, under his own steam was imperative. The second D'avin and Dutch return, he was off the planet and using all his best killjoy skills to start a very specific manhunt.

He tried to stop the shake in his hand as he carried the water back. But could feel Shay's eyes bore into him with every step. By the time he laid a hand back on the bed, she was at his side, lifting his hospital shirt, keen to inspect that no damage had been done to his healing wound.

"You're not ready" she told him, her hand peeling back the gauze, checking on the injury.

"Don't worry about me, I'll be fine". He replied, dismissing her concerns while she continued her assessment.

John watched her fingers lightly brush over the wound, looking for any blood loss, then ghost across another scar a little higher on his chest. He flinched at the contact, the memory of how he came about that particular mark still fresh in his mind. Recalling how Dr Jaeger had messed with his brother's head, causing the older Jaqobis to turn on those closest to him. Well It looked as though he would soon have a new scar to join that one. He felt destined to be physically marked by his most painful memories.

"When you leave I'm going to stay here" Shay suddenly announced, catching John completely off guard.

He had always assumed she would join him when they left the Union Republic. Maybe head back to Westerley and help her find work there. In fact, over the past week, every version Johnny had considered in leaving the planet, involved Shay leaving with him. He'd only just started to get to know this girl and he certainly wasn't ready to say goodbye.

"But you don't know anyone here" John weakly argued. The shock of her words evident on his face.

"I know, that's the best part. A new start, a place where I can do anything I want and be anyone I like." she began, trying to relay a convincing smile.

John bought her faked enthusiasm, he really didn't know her well enough to see past the sad smiles. He had no idea the girl would have happily followed him across the galaxy. That she had become quite taken with him over the past months. He didn't know that she feared her feelings would only grow, the longer she stuck around and how no good could come from them, especially after seeing the passionate connection he had with Dutch.

So instead John just stared at her, taking in the news and trying to accept her decision. But he couldn't just let her walk out of his life without doing something. She had showed him kindness on Sowber, kept him going even when he hit the very bottom. He wanted to pay her back somehow. Taking hold of her hand, squeezing it tight, John looked up to her, expressing sincerity in his face.

"Listen, I don't know how the hell you ended up on Sowber, but if you ever find your life heading in that direction again, you must contact me" he said, fixing his stare on her, conveying the importance of his words.

"You helped keep me alive on that moon, I escaped because of you. I got to see her again…" he revealed, cutting the last part of the statement off and chiding himself for almost admitting his feelings for Dutch out loud. Shay moved a little closer until John could feel her hurried breath on his skin.

"You have got it all backwards" She began, letting her hand brush against his cheek.

"You were _my_ salvation Johnny Jaqobis. I was just some sexer on the most miserable rock in the universe and then you arrived and changed my life". She said.

Johnny stayed close, making no effort to put distance between them. He didn't understand where she was going with her words, but he couldn't deny it felt nice to have her near.

"I would come to you, after the fights and you would tell me stories of your adventures. Stories that reminded me there was a whole stack of worlds out there, where people lived good full lives. Then I would sit there and listen to you talk about her. About the girl who meant everything to you. When I went to sleep at night, I would dream I was just like her. Dream I was strong and beautiful, and worthy of being loved by a man like you". Johnny closed his eyes for a moment, he had little memory of anything she spoke about because of those damn drugs. When he opened them again, he listened to her continue.

"You don't owe me any favours John, we are even. You gave me back the desire to seek something better, then you brought your friends, who gave me a way out. If anything, we have saved each other" Shay finally finished saying.

On Sowber, John had paid good Joy for her services and yet had never touched her, never taken true advantage of what that Joy afforded him. He wondered if they would still be stood together on the Union Republic if he had slept with her back then, if he had just used her to mask the pain from the fights, or help him forget about Dutch. He took a deep sigh and gave her a nod. He could accept they were even in terms of saving each other, but he could never take back the offer of help should she ever need it.

"If you really insist on offering me something…." Shay began to add, her voice suddenly sounding a little nervous

".. then maybe a goodbye kiss? Let me see what I've been missing these past few months" she asked, holding her breath while waiting for an answer. John took a moment to study the woman stood so close to him. She really was quite amazing and he envied those that would get to be part of her life.

"I think I can manage that" John eventually replied, pulling her close, letting his arm wrap around her waist as their lips touched. He gave everything he could to the kiss, letting her feel the gratitude he felt for her help as well as expressing just how much he was going to miss her. It was a good kiss, one he would remember for a long time and one worthy of a goodbye.

Shay pulled away first, letting a lazy smile fix across her face.

"Damn! Why do I think we just well and truly wasted those months we spent together on Sowber?" she began, stepping away from the bed and heading slowly towards the door.

"Goodbye Johnny Jaqobis, thank you for everything. Maybe now I'll go and tell my own stories. Stories of a man who saved my life and became my hero" she added, a satisfied grin quickly forming. Then she turned and walked out of the room, leaving Johnny alone.

* * *

 

**Ten Days earlier**

When Dutch had arrived at the hospital with an unconscious Johnny in tow, she had quickly been handed a pile of papers by the medic whom was D'av's old military combatant.

"What the hell are these?" she said looking between the medic and D'avin, as John and Shay were whisked away down a corridor with a full complement of medical staff in tow.

"It's the job I promised we would do in payment for his care". D'avin answered, watching as she scanned through the papers.

"You said it was a quick retrieval job, D'av, but this…." She said, noting pages of locations and dates.

"…. this is a damn scavenger hunt" she added angrily, looking up at the medic for answers.

"It's a neurological machine, it got lost in transit and we have know idea where it is" the man said, assuming that single statement would be enough to move Dutch into action. It wasn't.

"It's very expensive, too much to just order a replacement. We've tried to send people out to retrieve it, but apparently the payment wasn't worth the boundaries they might have to cross to find it" he added.

Dutch wished she could hurt people just by staring at them. If she could, D'avin would be on his knees right then, begging for mercy. Not only was it a scavenger hunt, but sounded like it would take them through some hostile environments. She hadn't wanted to leave Johnny's side until she knew he was safe and this damn job was sounding like it could take them away for weeks.

The medic stood apathetically, while the two of them became more riled up. There was a bluntness to his words and the fearsome duo stood in front of him did not seem to effect his mood.

"Let me get right to the point. I heard the desperation in D'avin's voice when he called me for help. Well I'm desperate too. Desperate for this machine. It can save thousands of lives. So…. if you want that medical care for your boy, then you will go get me the machine" he said.

This time it was D'avin who couldn't hold back his anger. He launched himself at the medic when hearing his threat of letting Johnny die if they didn't help. Dutch dived forward before D'avin got hands on the man. She had to admit, the medic had got them where he wanted them. He knew there was no way they could decline.

She studied the papers again, backtracking to the machine's last known location and already starting to map a plan of action. If they left straight away, they could get back all the sooner. Looking back up at the medic one last time, she made her last words to him count.

"We'll get the machine, but let me be very clear. If anything happens to _'my boy_ ', it won't be the hospital I come after, or the medical staff that failed him. I will be coming after you. You alone will feel my pain and I assure you, it will be great and agonizing". The medic held his ground, but she saw the slightest flinch at the fiery expression she held. Then they both turned their backs on the man and marched away to begin the mission.

Ten days later they dragged the battered machine back through the doors of the hospital and straight to the feet of the medic. They weren't interested in any gratitude the guy had to offer and they didn't want to waste time retelling the tales of how they found the chunk of metal. All they wanted, was to see Johnny and Shay and get far from the Union Republic system as quick as possible.

"He's about three corridor's down that way. Bay twenty seven" the medic instructed, watching them walk away before even he'd even finished the sentence. Both parties had kept to their end of the bargain, So in Dutch's mind, there really wasn't anything more to discuss.

D'avin walked by her side, down the long narrow passage ways, a smile appearing on his face as he recalled the adventure they'd just been on. It had been a wild ten days. Bar fights, kidnapping, narrow escapes. They certainly had a lot to tell Johnny when they saw him. He nudged her shoulder as they walked, gaining her attention.

"I still can't believe what you did to that street vendor on that last moon" he laughed, causing Dutch to smile too, the first time he'd seen her do so, in many months.

"Well some men just never learn. He's lucky he can still walk" she answered jovially. They continued on, discussing their expoits whilst passing by the numbered bay's, searching for their friend. Turning on to the last corridor, they finally found the twenty numbered rooms. They continued to talk and Dutch laughed as he retold the tale of a particular shop girl that seemed immune to the Jaqobis charm. They glanced through windows, looking for Johnny as they kept moving, until one sight made her stop altogether.

The smile was gone, the joy she felt a moment ago vanished. D'avin looked over to see what caused the sudden change and peered through the nearest window. They had found Bay twenty seven and also found someone who looked a lot like Johnny, in a fairly intense embrace with Shay.

Dutch felt her stomach drop at the sight of them together. She'd waited so long to see her best friend awake and healthily again. She had pictured them finally back together and finally back to normal. Being back on Lucy, accepting warrants, drinking in the Royale, and bickering about the little things, like who used the last of the hot water in the shower.

But seeing him there, pulling Shay close, made her heart hurt a little. Dutch never admitted feeling anything more than friendship for Johnny, but she recognised that deep down inside, she was jealous of Shay in that moment, jealous of the way his hands moved around her waist, holding her close to him.

She took a few deep breaths trying to calm the ache in her chest and regain control over her emotions. It would take her a few minutes to accept that having Johnny back in her life, now probably meant she would need to make room for Shay also. It was hard to accept, but Dutch would do it. Because at the end of the day, it was the sort of sacrifice you made for someone you love.

"You okay?" D'avin asked softly. Dutch had almost forgotten he was there, standing by her side, while she continued to stare on through the window.

"Yep!" she replied, hearing a crack in her own voice. Then forced herself to repeat the sentiment with a little more strength, until it sounded convincing.

"Come on then, lets go in and see the little idiot that put us through so much trouble" D'avin said, wrapping a comforting arm around her, pulling her tight. Dutch took a deep breath, raised up that emotional wall she tended to hide behind and let D'avin lead the way.


	9. Heading Home

**Place: On Board Lucy**

**Time: Now**

Dutch stood beneath the shower and let hot water flow over her body. It felt good, it felt cleansing and she would stay under the cascade until all her stupid, inconvenient emotions could be compartmentalized.

She had grown up within a strict regime. Khlyen had denied her a childhood, instead turning her into a weapon, leaving her detached and emotionless to the world around her. That lifelong training allowed Dutch to see clearly when chaos reigned. Allowed her to function efficiently when plans went awry. So it really shouldn't take her long to sort out this latest problem.

Shay was not coming back with them.

As much as it crushed Dutch to watch Johnny and Shay together, having the pretty young woman on board would have acted as a barrier, an obstruction to help Dutch to reign back the attraction she felt for her partner. Shay's presence could help her stay on the right side of her own personal rule – To not get involved with someone she cared about.

Dutch had made that resolution shortly after Khylen destroyed her husband all those years ago and she'd managed to keep it, right up until D'avin turned up. Everything that happened to D'av, the brain hijack, the kidnapping to Arkyn, just served as reasons to reinforce the rule.

She could not let anything like that happen to Johnny.

But it was to be, that the pretty brunette, would not re-boarded Lucy as they headed back to Westerley and D'avin, who she cared for, was also no longer a distraction that could be put between Johnny and herself. So Dutch stayed under the cascading water, searching for that strength to control her feelings and help keep her relationship with Johnny professional.

Emerging from the shower some time later, Dutch made her way to the rec room on board Lucy, where she watched the two brothers; sat over on the sofa, exchange stories from their childhood. She poured herself a drink and sat at the table. They laughed heartily at each other's youthful misfortunes, each blaming the other for any wrong-doing involved. To the casual observer, all looked well within the little threesome, all looked normal, but for Dutch things were far from good. She took a minute to think back to the meeting at the hospital just a day earlier.

D'avin had wrapped his arms around Johnny the minute they entered that hospital room. Showing his brother just how much it was good to see him alive and well, but Dutch held back, the image of him embracing Shay moments earlier, still pulled at her chest, forcing her to keep some distance. John looked good, a little thinner maybe, a little tired but good never the less. She watched him wince as D'avin squeezed his brother a little too enthusiastically, revealing her boy was far from healed.

D'av stepped back until she could see Johnny in full. He had that smile, the one that oozed self-confidence and bravado. The one that could melt the coldest of hearts. The one that melted hers long ago. She wanted to run to him too, just as D'avin had done, feel herself bound within his arms. But she swallowed that urge, letting it warp and twist inside her until a much more heated reaction emerged.

"Why the hell did you do it? Why did you just leave without telling me-anyone where you went?" she heard herself yell across the room. That smile of Johnny's waned and she saw him roll his eyes at her outburst.

"Well, it's good to see you too" he sarcastically replied and quickly regretted the response upon seeing the fire in her eyes.

"We're supposed to be a team Johnny, a family, and you just went AWOL, leaving a crap excuse with Pree, about a job you just had to do". she added, her aggressive stance bringing forth a concerned looking D'avin, who readied himself to referee a fight. That's when Johnny lifted his hands in surrender, took a deep breath and launched into the full story of Daichi Junior. How the man wanted to avenge his Uncle Varci, about finding the genetic bomb and the threats Junior had made regarding Dutch, D'av and even Pawter.

"The last clear memory I had was telling Junior the genetic weapon was destroyed, I made some excuse about it being damaged in a fight, but he just erupted in anger, dragged me into a room with the help of his thugs and pumped me full of a truth drug, forcing me to admit I destroyed it on purpose. After that everything gets fuzzy. After that I found myself on Sowber" John explained.

Dutch let him go on with the story, listening as Shay's name came up with increasing regularity. How Shay had filled the gaps on his fuzzy memories, how Shay cared for him after the fights he competed in, how Shay was his goddam savior. Dutch began to resent ever letting that sexer escape Sowber with them, but then Johnny announced she wasn't coming with them and then, Hell, that's when Dutch's mind just exploded.

Now, just twenty-four hours later, she sat in the rec room, looking over at her best friend, realizing she still hadn't embraced him, hadn't acknowledged just how good it was to have him back. Keeping her distance seemed important. She was very aware, if she let her guard down for even a minute, she would be across the room ready to jump the boy's bones and it would take a hell of a lot more strength than even D'avin could muster to pull her off.

Dutch suddenly jolted up from the seat in the rec room. A burning flush spreading across her cheeks, that she blamed on the hard liquor she'd just swallowed and not the sudden lascivious thoughts that were rattling around her brain. The brothers looked over from the sofa, breaking their conversation.

"You ok?" Johnny asked quickly, his brow knitted with a moment of concern. Dutch looked back and got caught in those blue eyes of his. She faltered in her response.

"Yeah, I've just got to…. just need to…." the words wouldn't come, so she just backed towards the exit, pointing in its general direction. Quickly turning and leaving the room, Dutch knew exactly what it was she 'just needed to do'. She needed to get back under that bloody shower.

* * *

Johnny watched Dutch leave the room and felt a knot in his stomach. He'd always knew she'd be pissed that he'd left all those months ago, but he hadn't expected it to be like this.

He could feel a divide between them, as wide as an ocean. There was a time just before D'avin turned up in their lives, when the two of them had been so close, they knew what each other was thinking. It's what made them such a great Killjoy team. They could anticipate each other's moves, they trusted their lives to each other. And that's what was hurting Johnny the most. The thought that he had lost Dutch's trust. Lost the privilege of being one of the very, very few to have gained it in the first place.

He turned back to his brother who more than made up for the shunning he'd received from Dutch. It was good to see D'av looking so well. After they had picked him up on Arkyn, it was touch and go for a while, they didn't quite understand what he had been through on that rock, but looking at him now, Johnny could see the brother he knew from childhood staring back at him. D'avin passed over a bottle of pumpkin beer and began to regale the story of the Union Republic scavenger hunt, when Lucy's voice rang out from the PA system.

" _We are now within communication range with Westerley"_

Johnny leapt from the couch and pulled out his comms, his fingers rapidly trying to connect a link for Pawter. He felt his head swim with relief at hearing her assertive tones, then once again when she confirmed she was safe. After speaking for a good ten minutes, he discovered that Junior had indeed been back to Old Town on a couple of occasions, looking for Dutch mainly, but had failed to find her or D'avin, largely because they had been half way across the J looking for his sorry ass.

For the first time since waking up in the hospital, Johnny felt the tension in his shoulders drop. Then he let out a breath he'd been holding for what seemed like forever. In a short time, they would touch down in Old Town, spend a little time reconnecting with the people he cared about and when that was done, Johnny would start making his plans for finding Daichi Junior.

* * *

 

The air in Old Town was foul and the streets filthy but Johnny didn't care as he just breathed it all in. It felt good to be back. His mind's eye, pictured Westerley Old Town pre-firebombing. He'd forgotten the destruction that had taken place there, until his eyes saw the wreckage still littered every corner of the street.

He walked on, a couple of paces behind Dutch and D'avin, mainly to avoid the hostility she was still throwing his way, then as they turned on the main street, John caught sight of a face he recognized.

"Johnny Jaqobis" the figure called in a less than cordial tone. Dutch saw the figure at the same time as John and turned to face him, a cloud of anger forming behind her eyes.

"You have to be kidding me, your first step on Westerley in seven months and we bump in to Curtsee" Dutch roared, saying the girl's name like a sound you made whilst vomiting.

"Ok, just calm down, You weren't the only person I abandoned that day, I just need a minute to put things right. You and D'av head over to the bar and I'll catch up." Johnny said, trying not to let his tone match the anger Dutch had in hers. He watched her turn on her heels and walk off.

"You left me alone in that flea ridden dump you claimed was a hotel room" Curtsee began, referring to rented sexer rooms they had got 'busy' in just before Junior had walked into the bar and changed everything . He could hear the hurt she felt, hidden underneath all her fury as she laid into him, shouting and roaring. Johnny didn't have it in him to defend himself. He had done a lot of people wrong that day he left and Curtsee was on a growing list of people he'd disappointed. So he just stood there and took it all. After it was over and John was left alone, he felt the burn on his cheek from where she delivered one hell of a slap. Finally he walked slowly on towards the Royale to meet with the others.

Reaching the front door, John placed a hand on the handle, but suddenly stopped.

Something didn't feel right.

He stepped back, a shiver tingling down his spine. Then he looked up and down the main street. Since leaving Curtsee, John hadn't seen anyone go in or come out of the bar. He also couldn't hear the common sounds of drunken jeers emanating from its depths. There could be a hundred reasons for the lack of noise but Johnny knew deep down that Junior was back, and the bastard was inside that bar with everyone he loved.


	10. A moment together

**Place: Westerley Old Town**

**Time: Now**

John cursed repeatedly, then crouched to the floor outside the Royale, trying to calm the panic flooding his mind. He needed to get inside, but covertly. He had to assess what was going down, so he could work out what the hell to do. Going in the front door, guns blazing was out of the question. He was a crack shot with a weapon, but the kind of backup Junior usually bought with him, meant that John would need some good old fashion brute force, something he still lacked, since recovering from a hospital stay.

He remembered the structural damage done to the building during the firebombing, he'd helped clear of lot of it himself. On the upper floor, in the room Pawter had claimed as a clinic, John knew there was a hole. He had helped the doctor move some furniture to cover it. If it was still there, it would be his way in. The hole was small, but Johnny was sure he could make it.

The light in Old Town began to die and night slowly crept down as Johnny jogged around the rear of the building. He glanced up to the room and quickly began climbing up broken brick and stone, pulling himself up and over the ledge. He felt the stiches along his wound pull a little, but stay intact, then he stretched himself into the small space. There, he heard voices, both he recognized. His instinct had been correct, it was Daichi Junior. John cursed again, this time silently while anger flowed through him. The other voice was Dutch and he could tell from the way she groaned, that he had injected her with that vile truth drug.

John had missed the bulk of his partner's interrogation. He had missed the sociopath ask her for Johnny's location, missed the guy drill her for information on the genetic bomb. And he had missed Junior smugly spill Johnny's own truth drug confession. The one where he admitted to being in love with Dutch. By the time Johnny had crawled close enough to hear more than just incoherent mumbles, the conversation had moved on to D'avin.

"…. so instead you walk in here with big brother D'avin, arm in arm, looking very cozy. I'm guessing he's the one you bat those big lashes for. I bet I'm right. Do you love soldier boy D'avin?"

John could hear Dutch fight to reveal her answer, he could feel the pain she was going through, trying so hard to suppress it.

"Yes!" she eventually conceded and Johnny couldn't help but feel hurt a little by her response. He'd accepted that truth long ago, but, hearing it still cut deep. John then heard the door to the room open and one of Junior's henchmen, pull the crime lord away, something more important clearly needing his attention. As soon as the door closed, Johnny wasted no time, leaning forward, he pushed the heavy steel cabinet away from the hole.

"Dutch? Dutch, come on, we have to move now" he called with urgency, once the gap was big enough to see into the room. She was crouched on the floor, hair splayed all around, her eyes screwed tight, trying to get a handle on the fire spreading through her veins. She crawled towards him, following his voice more than anything else.

He guided her through the hole, both stumbling awkwardly through, then helped her gently down the outside of the building. Once clear, Johnny sat Dutch down on a large section of broken down wall, then knelt down in front of her.

His hands gently moved stray strands of hair out of her eyes while she sat, head bent forward, taking in long deep breaths.

"The pain will pass in a few minutes" he told her quietly. He wasn't speaking from his own experience. The two times he' been pumped full of the drug, it had taken considerably longer than 'a few minutes' to overcome it, but he knew Dutch and knew her tolerance for pain. The truth drug would have been pretty low on the torture she'd endured over the years.

"Right, if you stay here, I'll go back inside and see if I can work out what the hell is going on in there" he said, standing up and looking back at the hole. He ran a hand over his face and prayed that a decent plan would begin to form in his head, currently he stood there with absolutely nothing to go on. He made a move to start his ascent up the wall, but felt Dutch suddenly grab at his arm.

"Don't" she called, in more of a growl, gritting her teeth against the pain that still coursed through her body. John immediately stopped and knelt back down in front of her. Her grasp on him was solid, in fact it felt more like an iron grip. She looked him in the eyes, fixing him with an intense stare.

"Don't, you dare leave me again" she said fiercely, making John just crumble inside. Would she ever forgive him for leaving all those months ago? He put on hand gently against her face feeling the burn of her skin underneath.

"Please, Dutch, please believe me" he begged, feeling the need to explain once again why he left with Junior seven months ago.

"I only did it for you, I thought I could handle it without you getting involved. After everything we went through getting D'avin back from Arkyn. I wanted to give you some time to breathe, some time for you and D'avin to spent together…."

"Stop!" she cried out.

"You need to stop with all the D'avin and me stuff. There is not D'avin and me, hasn't been for a long time. We… just aren't right for each other" she added, her words, spoken quickly and in a clipped tone. John sat back on his haunches, confused by her outburst.

"What do you mean, I just heard you in that room with Junior. I just heard you say you love him"

"I do love D'avin, just like I love Pree and Alvis and Bellus and even Pawter." She answered abruptly.

"They are people I will always care about John, people that I would do anything to protect" she paused and lifted her eyes to meet his. There was less edge to her tone now, proving she was beginning to win the battle against the fire in her veins.

"But there is only one person in this whole bloody star system, who I just can't be without". She added, holding his gaze, ensuring he understood she was talking about him. John knelt in front of Dutch utterly speechless. When it came to how they felt about each other, neither had ever been that honest, that forthcoming. He wondered if some of that truth drug had been responsible for the outburst.

Within the stunned silence between them, John felt her hand come up to his face, pulling him tentatively towards her.

"Do not ever leave me again" she repeated, inches from his face. The words were softly spoken but still very much an order, not a request. Then he felt her close the gap between them and catch his wordless mouth with her own, pulling lightly on his bottom lip. John pushed into the kiss, deepening it, not giving her an opportunity to pull away, not letting either of them dismiss it as a mistake.

Hell, he loved the taste of her. The memory of their last kiss, back in the bar, had kept him company over many nights, but it did not compare to the reality. Every part of her flooded his senses. The feel of her fingers brushing through his hair, encouraging him to stay close, to keep going. The sound of her hitched breaths as her head fell back, allowing him to taste more of her, kissing along her jaw and across her collarbone. All the while breathing in the incredible scent of her skin. The girl had got her message across, there was no way John was ever leaving her again.

Still on his knees, John needed to get closer, but struggled with his position, he wrapped his arm around her waist and lifted her swiftly to a higher rock. He wanted Dutch to know just how much she meant to him. How much she formed part of who he'd become, how she was the one person that knew him best, and in turn, that he was the person who knew her best too. In a raspy timbre John whispered lightly across her ear.

"Yalena!"

He failed to keep the hum of desire from his tone, as he spoke the girls real name. The name that only a privileged few knew. He felt Dutch shiver beneath him at the whispered word. For a moment he stilled his movements, wondering if that tremble had been residual pain from truth drug rather than the feel of his breath across her skin. He pulled back, very slightly, just enough to be able to look at her, concern clearly showing in his face.

"You ok?" he asked, looking into her wide dark eyes, only to see the same desire his own eyes held reflected back at him. Dutch didn't reply, not with words anyway, just hooked her fingers around his belt loops pulling him forward. The act caused them to bump against each other, until every part of their bodies touched. Dutch's legs naturally wrapping around his waist.

John felt warm hands push his shirt up, over his head, while somewhere in the back of his mind a voice was shouting at him. Telling him to stop, reminding him his friends were inside the Royale waiting for his help, waiting to be rescued. The voice screamed how they had both picked the worst possible time to finally explore each other. But in the end the voice was distant and easy to ignore, just as Dutch seemed to be doing. This was their moment. They both realized it, deep down knowing, that if they stopped, they would never get another chance again.

The bombed out, back yard of a filthy bar wasn't the most romantic setting, but John would take it.

He helped Dutch out of her own shirt, losing a button or two in the process, leaving her pressed firm against him in just underwear and tight trousers. They shifted together, hot and hungry, trying to find a more comfortable position, leaning backward across the rock surface. Hands moved across bare skin, pulling and heaving, anything just to feel closer. When John heard his name fall unfinished from her lips, he was sent over the edge. Way past the point of no return, nothing short of a black rain storm could have stopped him then. Dutch's hands fumbled at the button of his pants, encouraging him to act similarly and help undo the clasp on her tight trousers. The voice he'd heard earlier in his head had long vanished, he had become single-minded in one thing; and that was making his partner feel good.

Johnny desperately tried to slow it all down and just savor every touch, every taste and best of all, he could feel some trust between them return, he felt her expose some vulnerability to him, some of that softness that was rarely seen. John just took it all in, until he was unaware of anything other then the feel of Dutch in his arms. Unaware that night had well and truly fallen in Old Town, unaware of a chill that had suddenly picked up in the air.

And completely unaware of the multiple gun's pointing at them both, right up until the moment he felt the metal of a barrel press against his temple.

That's when John froze, as did the breathless beauty in his arms. Both took the swiftest of glances to count the armed detail surrounding then.

What an absolute mess they had got themselves in.

John took a second to re-engage his brains, then looked at Dutch who stared back, confirming she too had her head back in the game. They read each other's minds, they were killjoys, and had battled against worse odds than the six-man unit Junior had put on them.

Both grabbed the weapons at each other's hips and while still locked in a tight embrace opened fire at the enemy over each other's shoulder. A fire fight ensued, sending the pair diving for cover under the rubble, while taking out those who fired against them. They were certain of victory as each man went down, but, in amongst all the noise, John failed to see Junior come up behind them.

He heard the electric charge of a Taser seconds before seeing the thing hit Dutch full on. John leaped at Junior only to succeed in feeling the same effects as it was used on him. Then he was down on the floor, incapacitated and only able to watch as Junior dragged both their weak bodies inside the bar.


	11. The Warrant is All!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally managed to finish the story. Hope it is ok. Thanks for reading and any comments are appreciated. :)

**Place: Westerley Old Town**

**Time: Now**

When Dutch came around from the electro-shock, she found herself on her knees. Hands bound tightly on her lap and one of Junior's men standing behind her with a gun at her head. She wearily lifted her eyes to see the familiar surroundings of the bar, together with a row of chairs lined up directly opposite her.

Faces stared back from the chairs, many of which were strangers, poor souls who happened to be drinking in the bar when Daichi Junior came barging in. But in amongst those, were people she recognized, people who were her friends. Pree and Pawter met her eyes and sent a sorrowful gaze her way. It took a moment to understand their sympathetic expressions, until she felt a breeze across her skin and discovered she was knelt down in only her bra and pants. Then everything came flooding back.

"Guess what I caught these two doing, while you were all in here being held at gun point?" Junior gleefully asked the small group sat along the lined chairs.

It was then that Dutch noticed Johnny next to her, just a few feet away, He too was on his knees, hands bound and half undressed, that button on his pants still hanging undone. Guilt quickly wrenched at the pit of her stomach with what they had done. They left their friends to the hands of this psychopath.

She was disgusted with herself, appalled at her own recklessness and to make matters worse, every time she looked at John, she could still feel the tingle from where his hands caressed her body, still feel her head swim at the sound of his shaky breath against her ear. As much as Dutch wanted to deny it, there was part of her that just wanted to drag Johnny outside and finish what they had started.

"I'll give you a clue, they weren't out there formulating a plan to save you all" Junior added, laughing hysterically, the sound echoing off the walls. The madman walked around the room, briefly stopping to place the killjoy's confiscated weapons on a nearby table, along with the Taser.

Hearing his voice pulled Dutch's mind back from her lust filled thoughts and she tracked Juniors movements, while also taking stock of the men guarding the room. Her assessment eventually brought her eyes back to Johnny. She could read every thought rattling around his head at that moment. He was consumed with shame and anger. His head was down, eyes on the floor, unable to look at the face sat across from him, the face of his brother.

There was no doubt that in amongst all the hatred John was feeling towards Junior, there was a fair amount of remorse. He would feel he'd betrayed D'avin when he'd kissed Dutch and that just made her hurt even more. What had she done?

This was why she had that damn rule. This was exactly why she tried not to get involved with someone she cared about. People get hurt. And this time, a whole room of friends were suffering because of her selfish desires.

She tried to look away from D'avin, feeling as ashamed at her behavior as Johnny clearly was of his, but she just couldn't avoid his stare, she could feel him try and communicate something. His eyes very briefly shifted over to the table of confiscated weapons. He was telling her to stay focused, to get ready to fight. Dutch took a deep breath, pushed the self-loathing briefly aside and started to think of a way out of the situation.

One last look over at Johnny, let her see the anger building inside him. His body was physically pulsing with rage. He was always such a smart guy, always one step ahead of his actions, but Dutch could tell everything that man had been through was clouding his judgement. If they didn't think of something quick, Johnny was going to do something stupid.

They needed a distraction.

"What the hells do you want?" Dutch spat out at the short gangster who was still stalking the room, spouting rhetoric to the small crowd in front of him. Her outburst thankfully seemed to bring Johnny's attention away from his own murderous thoughts.

"What do I want?" Junior repeated, marching back to engage with Dutch and eyeball Johnny.

"I wanted this SOB to bring me that damn bomb. But he failed, so then I wanted him to die on that dusty rock, I dumped his ass on all those months ago" He said brandishing a gun at Johnny as he spoke.

"Then I wanted to come here and make his bitch find me a replacement bomb, make you pay for getting my Uncle Varci killed, but I didn't realize all the drama I would get in the deal. Didn't realize I'd pinned my hopes on a whore who can't even decide which brother to bed on any given day"

The use of the word 'whore' was the breaking point for Johnny and Dutch couldn't stop him pulling himself off the floor and hurtling towards Junior. But his hands were still bound together and Junior was expecting the attack. The opportunity to act and form a plan quickly disappeared when the man whipped Johnny back down to the floor with the butt of his gun.

"To be honest, I highly value trust and right now, I wouldn't trust either of you as far as I could throw you." He added, then turned back to Dutch to conclude his answer to her question.

"So what I ultimately want, is just to kill you both, here and now". There was a scary air of indifference to his tone.

They were about to run out of time and they needed the distraction quickly. Then one came from a face hiding in the shadows.

"Please, there must be another way, you can't just kill them" a certain scarback pleaded as he stepped forward, hands held high in a peaceful gesture.

"Alvis, don't!" both Dutch and Johnny called at the same time, panic obvious in their voices. They really didn't want anyone else involved in their mess. But the monk kept walking, slowly towards where Dutch and Johnny were knelt on the floor.

"At least let the other people go. You have the two you came for, don't let anyone else get hurt" Alvis added, looking directly at the crime lord, his words calm and appeasing, but Junior's stare was focused on something Alvis seemed to be holding in his hand.

"Is that Jakk?" Junior aggressively asked, regarding the small vile clutched in Alvis' fist. The scarback managed to nod just as Junior leapt forward and grabbed it from him.

"That's not for you" Alvis advised but Junior was passed listening to the creepy monk stood in the centre of the room.

Dutch saw the glint in Junior's eyes as he assessed the vial's contents. She had seen that look many times. A greedy excitement. It seemed that the man had taken a liking to the local drug of choice.

Junior, pulled the implanter he'd used to pump truth drug into Dutch, from one of his pockets and quickly fitted the Jakk vile into it, then wasted no time in pushing the liquid bliss into his blood stream.

Alvis didn't stop him, didn't even say another word to the mad man, but she could tell from his expression that letting Junior get hold of the drug had been deliberate. He gave Dutch a knowing look, then turned back to Daichi Junior.

They were about to get their distraction.

Everyone in the room watched Junior's eyes glaze as the drug took effect, a lazy smile, a calming to his demeanor as the bliss hit. Then something else happened. The man coughed violently and blood flew out of his mouth. He stumbled back, hitting the nearby table, sending the confiscated weapons across the ground.

In the mad few moments everyone in the room were distracted by Junior's convulsions, D'avin dived at the fallen arsenal, grabbing the Taser while sliding the others towards John and Dutch. The elder Jaqobis quickly turned and electrocuted the guard at his side, taking the guys gun when he dropped to the floor. Then the three killjoys, acted with lightning speed. Each took aim at the guards around the room and fired with pin point accuracy. One shot, one hit.

As chaos reigned in the room, Alvis Akari, stood steady. That ever present composure surrounding him. His fingers pressed together, steepling upwards as though channeling a higher force. He moved over to Daichi Junior, who still struggled to find breath from the polluted drug that seeped around his system. He kicked the gun away from the man's hand. Leaving him defenseless on the sticky floor of the Royale.

"I told you that drug was not for you" he simply said, blaming the man's own greed for his current predicament. The monk was, as always, protecting the people in his care. Protecting the people of Westerley from harm. He was their very own Spiritual insurgent.

Once Dutch had managed to free herself and Johnny from the binds around their wrists, her partner ran to where Alvis stood over the criminal mastermind. The man was on his hands and knees still hacking up blood, slowly being poisoned by the tainted jaxx. Johnny watched him struggle, watched as he gasped for breath and Dutch knew any minute her partner's gun would raise and end the bastard's life.

Daichi Junior had made enemies right across the J star system. Enemies that would need to be kept at bay. Dutch knew that's why he had been so obsessed with getting his hands on a genetic bomb. A pretty strong defense against anyone planning to get in his way. But the thought of the damage the psychopath could cause with such a weapon was unthinkable. He was even crazy enough to start an extinction level event.

With those harrowing thoughts in mind, Dutch quickly pulled out her comms unit and rapidly tapped the screen looking for something. A slim chance that someone with so many enemies would have…."

"Johnny wait!" she called, quickly jogging to his side and showed him the screen on her comms.

It was a warrant, a level 4 from a planet far across the J cluster.

"Let's do this official and get paid in the process" Dutch suggested, looking down at the scum still coughing violently.

"You can do the honor's" she added.

Johnny bent down and assessed the man who'd put him through hell over the past seven months. This was finally the end to it all.

"Daichi Junior, on behalf of the RAC, you have been locked and served" he quoted, but before he could do anything else, the man gave another violent cough and then fell back, cold and motionless against the floor, poisoned by the drug.

Dutch watched John lean over and confirm that Junior was dead. Her partner stared at the man for a good few moments, realizing it was all over, that his reign was at an end. She saw John try to stand, but then sway, and knew he was about to pass out.

"Pawter!" she yelled across the room, before diving towards her partner as he collapsed unconscious into her arms.

The doctor came quickly, pulling off her sweater and handing it to Dutch, letting her finally cover her half naked body. Dutch gratefully wrapped it about herself while watching Pawter assess her friend.

"Be careful with him, he's been through a lot" she told the pretty medic.

Dutch knew that day they picked him up at the hospital, he was far from fit. That he was still healing from the wounds sustained on Sowber. Since then he'd been shocked with a Taser, beaten with the butt of a gun, pulled himself up the side of a building to rescue her and finally been involved in a fairly heavy make-out session. It was clear that everything had finally caught up with her best friend.

She let Pawter take over and enlist help from Alvis and D'avin to carry his limp body towards her surgery.

* * *

 

Then for the next couple of hours, Dutch stayed in the bar and helped clear up the evidence left behind. Moving the guards through Pree's basement access was physical work and she was grateful of an activity, that stopped her mind from wondering back to having Johnny's warm body pressed against her.

The heavy work didn't however, stop her glancing back at the staircase at regular intervals, waiting for some news of how he was doing. Even D'avin hadn't resurfaced from the room and she assumed the two were having a brotherly conversation, about the nature of her and Johnny's relationship.

Eventually, a good while later, John ambled down the stairs, unaided and looking pretty much like his normal self.

"Can I have a word?" he quietly asked, using an arm to usher Dutch to a quiet corner of the bar, half out of the view from the other patrons.

She stood opposite him, waiting on what he had to say and noted he wore an expression similar to the evening they kissed in the bar. That mixed emotion of fear and hunger in equal measure. But as they stood, no words came. Whatever it had been, was clearly too difficult to communicate. In the end he opted instead to just pull her close and kiss her.

He pressed his lips hard against hers, moving them slow and deep and she knew instantly what he had wanted to convey.

This would be their last moment together.

The embrace didn't have that feverish desire she'd felt out in the back yard, or the nervous anticipation of that bar kiss. It was something else, something serious. Everything about it felt final and she gave her whole self into the moment, committing to memory every delicious taste, every exploring caress. Storing it all away, so she could forever carry it around with her. She let it all fill her up, simultaneously feeling the bliss alongside the sorrow.

When John eventually pulled back, Dutch felt her heart break, an actual painful stab in her chest. He was still standing close, his forehead resting against her own, his hands still running lightly across her skin, but Dutch felt a chill from the distance that would now forever be between them.

"We can't do this can we?" Johnny whispered, already knowing the answer, but throwing it out as a question, on the slim chance she had solutions to all the reasons that kept them apart.

"No we can't" she confirmed, a little too bluntly, but it was the truth. Just one psychotic little criminal had managed to cause so much trouble and she couldn't bear to think of the damage someone like Khlyen would do, if he decided to use Johnny to hurt her.

Her partner nodded sadly at her reply, fully accepting what he had already known. Johnny had his own reasons for keeping their relationship professional.

"This little team of ours; you, me and D'avin are so important to me. We work well together, we kick ass together, you are my family and I love you. I just can't risk losing that, losing what we already have" Johnny said quietly.

The RAC had brought them together, had been a stabilizing constant in all of their lives. For every bit of bureaucratic crap that came with being a Killjoy, she would always be grateful to the organization, for bringing them all together and keeping them that way.

When both were finally in agreement to throw themselves into work, to do what they do best, she couldn't help bring the Killjoy oath to mind. She observed how those simple words seem to bend easily to so many aspects of their life. She looked up at Johnny and took the deepest of breaths.

"The Warrant is all?" she suggested, feeling the sorrow in her eyes spread to Johnny's.

"The Warrant is all." he committed back, the words sticking in his throat a little.

They continued to stayed close for another few moments, letting their decision take root, finding the strength to reign back those feelings and then they parted, turned away from each other and walked off in opposite directions.

* * *

 

"Hey! You ok with all this?" Pree asked a pensive looking D'avin, who sat at the corner of the bar. The bar owner didn't know the whole story of Dutch's relationship with the elder Jaqobis, but guessed what he had witnessed in the bar couldn't have been much fun.

The older brother tore his gaze away from his two partners and smiled back at the bartender.

"Yeah! I'm good, just wondering what's going to happen between those two now" he pondered.

While up in Pawter's surgery, Johnny had almost begged for forgiveness, apologized for his actions regarding Dutch. The boy was so pained by his decisions and the more he talked, the more D'avin realized just how much his little brother cared for Dutch. John's feelings ran deep, much deeper than his own ever had. He realized he should be the one apologizing to Johnny. He was the one who should never have slept with her in the first place.

"I can tell you exactly what will happen with those two" Pree replied, bringing D'avin away from his sobering thoughts.

"They'll force themselves to stay away from each other. Lose themselves in work instead" he began, likening them to being in a centrifuge, letting the job spin them around, keeping them separated.

"But here's the thing, whether they'll admit it or not. Those two love each other , and have done for best part of a decade. At some point the warrants will end, they will stop spinning around and come crashing back together." He finished, absolute confidence in his prediction.

D'avin looked back over at Johnny, who sat close to Alvis, listening to the scarback explain how he'd confiscated the poisoned drug, after finding it circulating down in the tunnels. Across the other side Dutch was deep in conversation with Pawter and D'av just couldn't help notice the two's inability to go five minutes without glancing across the room at each other.

He realized the three of them were about to embark on an interesting ride and he prayed at some point in the future, the two could eliminate whatever kept them apart and finally be together. They more than deserved to be happy.


End file.
